April 15, 2013

April 15,2011

Two years ago today I was sitting at B.C women's hospital 29 weeks 4 days pregnant. I had been admitted to the hospital for 2 weeks and in Vancouver waiting the girls arrival for 2 months.
The day started like any other day on the maternity ward.. Getting woken up at all hours of the night for a non stress test.. Which was never easy! Hannah was always hiding under my bladder. Then the noon non stress test something wasn't right, but it was baby b/Hailey that was having decals.. So they scheduled me to go for an ultra sound immediately. Sure enough baby a/Hannah's had back flow going to the placenta. They said they would do one more scan in a few hours and then go from there. Not a positive were delivering but defiantly wasn't going to be much longer. It felt so serial.. I had waited 8 weeks for this day to come and now that it was here I wasn't ready. I thought their would be more time.. More notice that baby A/hannah wasn't getting as much blood flow. But looking back I suppose her not growing for 3 weeks should have been enough notice.
Once they wheeled me back up to my room they informed me I was going to need to be transferred down stairs to emergency/delivery and that I wasn't allowed to eat!!!! So I called DB(their "dad") to let him know what was going on and that I was scared but he was more interested in playing with a whoppy cushion then listening to how serious this was.
By the time I got down stairs to emerg it was probably close to four and I didn't have any of my stuff just my phone and phone charger. There wasn't a tv or any way to kill time and service only worked in one corner of the room...(and I was suppose to be laying in bed). The doctor talked to be briefly when I got to this ward and then didn't come back untill after dinner time to tell me the plan.
The plan was that we would deliver tomorrow(April 16,2011) around 4. They would do an ultra sounds first thing in the morning to make sure everyone's ok and then go from there... Still not a defiant when.
By this point I'm balling.. Not because I'm scared they won't make it.. I actually truly felt this was what was best for them to get out of me knowing what could happen if the blood flow stops. I was crying because I was scared and alone.. My mom was a ferry away and DB was 16hours or a 1 and a half hour plane ride away.. I was so scared of the though of a spinal tap and being cut open when I was awake.
So I called DB crying tell him what I knew.. That Hannah wasn't doing good and they would most likely be delivering them tomorrow.. As of that moment that was the plan. He checked the flights but wouldn't book a flight because it wasn't for sure and he "didn't want to miss work". Since he wasn't going to come even just to be here if they weren't born for a few days I called my mom and asked her to come.. But by this point she was to far away from the last ferry of the night to make it so she would come on the first ferry.
The 4am ultra sound was bad. The doctor came in and told me they would be delivered at 10am, thankfully my mom got their by 8am. When I told DB the news he freaked on me! Saying that they could wait till he go their at 2 if I really wanted and that I just wanted to have them. It was horrible.. On top of being scared of a c section I had this to deal with.. I asked the doctor is she would talk to him because he didn't believe me .. I probably passed her in the hall once every 2 months for the hole time hannah was there(a year and a bit) and the only reason she remembers me is because of this.. Who treats someone who's about to give birth to premature children like this.. Expesially when they have spent 2 months being close to children's hospital for this.
It sickens me to think of this.. It didn't even fully process that they were wheeling me into the OR because I was so scare of him! They had to forcefully take my phone out of my hand when we entered the OR..
But on the bright side I was so numb going into the OR that the needles in my back didn't phase me.. For the last one I actually tried to straighten my back and look at the person putting the needle in my back while he was doing it.

All my worries were really over when I hear little Hannah's cry.. Surly if a baby her size could come out crying everything would be all right.

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